Kept on running away
to find a place
while you were counting to hundred
hid inside a dark room
I knew you'd never find me
wished that you would have
but you didnt even try
now I am hiding still
you never came to seek
the dark room its getting darker
I want to get out
its not like you'd care
but I cant meet eyes with you again
I know I would scream
and then give you the tightest hug
while you'll be wishing
that please go back and hide
there's a reason why
I didnt find you
not even tried
took me a while to realize
how your love was the dark room
which I cant now escape
was alone then
will be alone forever
until I let go
I know you won't even care
but its so damn hard
to leave the pain
moving on
from something bad to worse
I know I'll just hurt myself
will keep it in and then hide again
until
I find someone
who comes to seek
who cares
but I know
its always just going to be me
finding myself
hurt and alone
but I'll be okay I promise
one day I'll stop playing this game
stop hiding or running away
instead I'll just make up an excuse
and say I am busy I have to go
like everyone else did
when I was five and will do at
twenty eight too
never going to let anyone inside again
not going to play another round
of hide and seek its silly and sad
its just counting and hiding and waiting for someone to show up
when they might have even forgotten
your existence
wish I knew this when I played this game for the first time
that this is what I'll be doing
my whole life
childhood is the best teacher
aint it?


© ~notyourfavperson