we can escape the people who hurt us but what do we do if it's our own family?

Our family started going downhill during the lockdown when my mom found out about my dad's secret debts. those debts kept growing and so did the distance between my them. they fought almost everyday so much that I could still hear them argue in my sleep. I used to cry by myself to sleep. it settled a little my dad swore on me to never make any more secret debts but after around one year my mom found out that he did the same thing again she was so angry that they wanted a divorce but stayed together for me and my sis

my dad swore on me and broke the promise and that's when my respect for him totally died. my parents are still together and are still fighting over financial and family issues and it only makes my mental state worse because along with the career and study pressure I have I also have to keep defending my mom against my own dad
I have to support her when she's cussing at my dad and my dad is just so irresponsible and he never considered my mom,me and my sister as family my mom is the one running out house because my father's salary is not even enough for the debts he made. my dad is totally wrong but whenever my mom gets too tired or frustrated she vents it on us along with my dad. she even said that God should not give any parents kids like us. it's that bad. so if I have to choose one parent to live with I would rather run away from my home it hurts so much that sometimes I wish I wasn't born

we children must listen and endure everything silently even if it's breaking us from inside
sometimes a divorce is better than staying with eachother after so many disagreements
because staying together not only hurts them but also their kids who have to see the worst side of their own parents
I wanted to share my story too after reading
Zoë Rebecca K's story and I yeah it feels good to take it all out finally